Category: Surviving Adulting

So, my friends I wanted to share these moments with you so you can have the courage to get out of your comfort soon, even a little like I did. Seek new adventures and new memories or take a big leap and seek out that job you always wanted. Whatever that leap might be for you at this moment take charge and see how life rewards you.

Thank you for stopping by The Selfish Column and getting this far. Until next time selfish readers.

~S.C~

Hello everyone and welcome back to The Selfish Column. Hope all is going great in your lives as always.  As you can see the topic for today is for all my single living peeps!!!. Recently I spoke to a few people in my life that are currently living on their own and shared some really fun and interesting ideas on how we manage this new sense of freedom… ish?!! .

So how do I get my motivation back once the laziness hit, how do I stay productive throughout the day you ask?. Well, look no further at the list provided below.

1. Don’t feel guilty if you are not big on grocery shopping:

Three trips a week to the grocery store is better than one giant one that has items you didn’t use go bad. The reason why I stress this is because I used to feel like I needed to go to the grocery store and buy everything possible because in my head that’s what adults do. But I learned very quickly that I was wasting a shit ton of money with that kind of mentality.

2. Don’t feel rushed into getting your home together all at once:

When I first got the place to myself, I had all these expectations of my home. I kept telling myself that my space had to be a certain way at a certain time before anyone can enter. Once I took a step back and let things fall into place, I was able to enjoy the process without rushing or breaking the bank. The space I took between actually purchasing things and bringing them into my place allowed me to come across really amazing sales.

3. Figure out what budget works for you and write everything down:

Things can get lost quickly if you do not pay attention to your spending. I speak this to you as I continue to struggle to find my own balance at times. Budgeting does not mean that once it’s written down that it’s set in stone. As long as you don’t plan to stay stagnant in your current life, your budget can always grow.

4. Give yourself one day a week or even a month that is dedicated to administration:

I learned this from an amazing blogger and friend Justine Celine. This woman is so full of wisdom when it comes to this blog thing. Once I decided to take this challenge on with my emails, I started incorporating it to my everyday life. this included things such as making list for house stuff, making appointments, and returning calls from family and friends. Pretty much anything you feel fit in your life to keep the wheels going can be put on the list.

The one thing I can leave with you is to remember that you can’t put a price tag on your peace of mind. What works for you may not work for someone else.

Thank you for stopping by The Selfish Column, I can’t wait to hear all of your thoughts.

~S.C~

Hey everyone and welcome back to The Selfish Column. Can you believe it is Valentine’s Day? Who doesn’t love “LOVE”!!! Better yet who doesn’t love sharing the love with everyone around them?. This year, I decided not only to celebrate Valentine’s Day but also share Galentine’s Day with my girls. What’s Galentine’s Day you ask? Well, it’s the day before V-Day; where you and your lovely girls treat each other to a day of fun, laughter, and DRINKS!! This year with the help of La Marca Prosecco I and my lovely ladies took the morning by a storm. We woke up to a lovely pancake breakfast and some good old Mimosa (what more can a girl ask for).

The day was spend sipping on some yummy bubbles, and taking in the sugar high from the cupcakes. (Remember sugar, spice, and everything Nice- (bet you can’t complete the phrase).

Who said girls can’t have fun while getting ready. Honestly, this morning was perfect, I haven’t laughed this hard and enjoyed Prosecco like I did. La Marca really came through for the kid. If you know me, you know Prosecco is not usually my go to, but with how tasty, light and smooth it was, it made for such a great start to my morning and afternoon. The great thing about this Prosecco ladies and gents, it can transition greatly throughout any event you have during the day.

Did I mention this bottle is smooooth, I mean like smoother than a fresh perm!!! Hahhhhah.  Really though the bubbles are persistent which goes perfectly with the crisp finish it adds to your taste palate.

This is the perfect bottle not only for a day like Galentine’s Day, but any other occasion coming up in your life. The year is still young and there are plenty of events to be celebrated, so why not pick up a bottle of La Marca Prosecco for the occasion.

As always thank you for stopping by and getting this far into the post. A special thanks to the girls that came to spend this Galantine’s Day with me.  I am forever at aww with the love and dedication I receive every day from all the amazing women in my life. Today was just the tip of my lifelong celebrations with so many of you.

~S.C~

Welcome back to The Selfish Column everyone, hope all is well in your world of adulting. As you can tell by the title today we are talking about that “wonderful” thing called student loan. And by wonderful I mean that life-sucking nightmare that gives false investment into your future (lol where is the lie though… RIGHT).  If you live in North America and have ever set your mind on a post-secondary education, you may have noticed the expensive price tag that comes with this decision. Don’t get me wrong, investing in your future is an incredible thing and so is continuously educating yourself.

A little About My College/University Journey

During my college years, I was living with my parents while working the weekends and summer days to pay for my classes. Living at home helped minimize my expenses while paying for school.  After graduating my college program,  I went straight to the third year of my university program and took out my first loan.  When it came time to pay it off I struggled with it because not only did I move away from home but I went back to school without informing student loan. Honestly, I did not know how to go about paying this. I fell behind and pretended that my loan didn’t exist, but that didn’t last long. Eventually, I took control of the situation and started slow. I decided to take a look at my interest rate and my income tax returns.  The best course of action for me at the time was to give my tax return back to the government. It wasn’t easy to give this cash up because tax season is always around my birthday and the reality of no more extra birthday cash was saddening ( no more stunting with my returns hahahahahah).  But I had to remind myself constantly that I lived without the income tax return money for a year and managed to survive just fine. After all, being out of debt is far more important in the long run.  So without further or do, please see below my basic tips on managing your student loan.

Tips:

1. Check when tuition is due for each semester:

This is good if you pay your own classes. This gives you time to save up and pay slowly toward your classes. I did this while in college, I made a point to treat it like a monthly bill and visited the registrar office each month to pay off a large sum.

2. Save a portion of your grants and or bursaries:

With a student loan, you get things such a grants and scholarships, I know it is money you don’t have to pay back but that doesn’t mean you can’t use a portion of it towards your student loan. 

3. Use a portion of your income tax to pay a large amount:

Most students use their income tax return as extra money to go on trips— But if you divide accordingly, you will be able to enjoy more of it in the long run.

4. Always pay on top of your interest rate:

But most importantly always AlWAYS pay on time.

5. Build a relationship with the agent that holds your account:

Call the office and find out who is assigned to your account because having a strong and honest relationship with your agent can work in your favor. Keeping them in the loop of your financial situation can avoid your account being forwarded to collections and receiving those debt collector calls that we all hate.

Thank you for getting to this point and reading the whole post. I hope you found these tips to be helpful in your student career. Some of these tips I learned from personal experience and the rest I found afterward that I thought would be useful. If you enjoy this blog post please leave a comment below sharing your thoughts on it.

Have a great week everyone.

~S.C~

Hello and welcome back to The Selfish Column everyone. Hope all is going well this week for all of you. I want to discuss with you guys one of the most popular trends of 2016. Last year we saw a rise of the no makeup look all thanks to Alicia Keys. I have read so many articles praising this movement and also read some comments criticizing it. Based on my research, I found that women were stating how relieved they were to see a star such as Alicia Keys taking a stand. Many women felt free and understood others felt unbothered and criticized Alicia Keys (myself included) for this. The reason why I felt so unbothered is because I never took makeup and the concept of it to heart. In my 25 years of life, I never looked at makeup as a way to cover up imperfections, seeing that the era which I grew up in and my worldview of it were cultural and not an insecurity. My personal belief is that makeup should be fun just like any other things in life and confidence should come from within. I know I know we hear this all the time and for some people, this can be difficult. But trust me when I say this… there is value in being your own cheerleader and most importantly there is value in being YOU. At the end of the day, whether you wear something such as makeup to make you feel better or anti-aging cream to keep the skin youthful, we all must see a value within ourselves first. The reason why I feel so compelled to state this is because I have never looked at makeup as a major part of my life, truthfully I don’t know much about makeup. Just ask any of my friends about my makeup collection and they will tell you that it is SAD. I have been using the same technique since the ninth grade and my knowledge of my makeup believe it or not is sub par…. VERY LIMITED. Due to not focusing so much on this allowed me to feel free and find other ways to boost my confidence. I learned that my confidence comes from my ability to feel useful, to gain knowledge and be intelligent. I am such a workaholic that I find myself feeling low and down about myself if I’m not useful or working. The thought of being ignorant and not being able to contribute in discussions weighs heavier on me than whether I’m wearing makeup or not.

By now you should know where I am going with this. Having makeup will never change what’s on your mind, but it will always be a way to express yourself. I don’t see Loreal, Covergirl or Mac going out of business anytime soon. So do what makes you happy GIRL.  I am a girls girl, I love women and I think we are beyond powerful than what society portrays us to be.  We are not these simple creatures that paint our faces and pout our lips for pictures, I refuse to think we are that simple that we need a such a movement in our society.

I end this post by saying don’t sweat the small stuff. As women, we are part of a far greater purpose than to be concern about who is wearing makeup and who is not. Anyone can wear anything….. HECK we were clothes everyday right?  but it will never be what you wear or put on that leaves a lasting impression but rather how you express yourself. I would much rather see the world that is full of dedicated, hardworking, independent, thinking, knowledgeable women who wear makeup than the world that is so focused on tearing others down for putting makeup on.

If you made it this far thank you. If you are visiting for the first time thank you as well.

As mentioned on my Instagram page I will be giving away some goodies as a thank you for your support and love.

Giveaway: 

Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb Roll on Perfume and Tom Ford Lipstick. I love the two products and thought I should share with one of you guys. Both women and men qualify.

Rules:

1. Must follow my Instagram page
2. Must like my Facebook page

~S.C~

Welcome back to the Selfish Column everyone, hope you all had a great weekend.  This week I wanted to talk you guys about something kind of dear to my heart and the reason why I started my blog. As many of you know by now I love the concept of self-love and independence. If you have been following this blog for awhile now, you would have come across me referencing a book called “The Happiness Project” by Gretchen Rubin. When I first purchased the book almost three years ago to be exact, I really didn’t know what I was going to get out of it. The title was enticing. The first few pages really grabbed my attention and I was hooked from there. The book is about a woman (Gretchen Rubin) who decided after years of being married and having kids, was to find ways to work on the current challenges in her life in hopes it would improve her happiness. The book took you through her journey in which she set goals for herself each month and by the end of it, she calculated her accomplishments to see if this project had improved her overall happiness. I actually don’t want to give the ending away because I feel as though each person entering adulthood or even those still figuring out “adulting” should read it. I felt like this book changed my perspective as a young woman and ultimately helped me launch my blog ,”The Selfish Column”. Soon after completing the book, I asked a really  good friend of mine to help set up a blog and a platform. It was with his support and encouragement that really assisted me in going for my dream. David you rock!!!!

The first few pages of the book Gretchen made a list that really stood out for me and I thought I should share with you all. The list was called, “Secrets Of Adulthood”. Now I am not going to give the whole list away but rather share the steps that stood out for me the most. Hope you enjoyed this post and find it helpful in starting your own projects whatever it may be. Below are five keys things I found helpful from the book.

Secrets of Adulthood:

1. People don’t notice your mistakes as much as you think.
2. Most decisions don’t require extensive research.
3. By doing a little bit each day, you can get a lot accomplished.
4. It’s okay to ask for help.
5. Happiness doesn’t alway make you happy.

If you got this far on the blog, thank you, thank you, thank you. The support is much appreciated . Special thanks to my friend David for helping me out in my journey and The Happiness Project for being my personal guide through young adulthood.

~S.C~

1. Open a separate email account for all your shopping needs.

Let’s be honest everyone wants a good deal while shopping, but sometimes that deal comes in an email form. It can be difficult to filter through your personal emails and all those daily emails from your fav brands. I’m not the one to miss out on a good deal —so one day I decided to open a separate account to provide to all my fav stores and brands while shopping.

2. Cooking in foil is an easy way to cook for one.

This is perfect for the person living on their own and is constantly on the go. Pick your choice of protein (beef, chicken or fish) add your fav veggies and let the oven do the rest.

3. Always keep a staple black pump in your car.

Last minute invitations to events can have you rushing home to change or cancelling due to time constraints. Having a pair of black pumps can change the status of your outfit from day to night without having to miss out.

4. Always keep a small amount of cash on you.

I know we live in the age of technology and plastic money, but it doesn’t hurt to have real cash on you. I tend to leave a small amount at home just in case I lose my wallet or need to get a taxi home. I know I’m thinking of the worst case scenario here, but it’s always better to think ahead.

5. Have a general cover letter saved in your email.

As young adults we often find ourselves in positions or jobs not related to our career path. The best way to ensure you are always ready for the next step is by having a BOMB cover letter highlighting your skills without overshadowing the purpose of your resume. Even the most simple position should always get a cover letter.

If you got this far I want to say thank you, let me know your thoughts on these hacks and and share some of yours in the comment sections.

~S.C~

Have you ever wanted to just look at someone and ask them how they got so self entailed for so long?  I have always believed that people will go as far as you let them. If you don’t believe me look around study some people in your life and how they move and act toward you.

The concept of saying no can sometime be difficult because many of us are faced with guilt and and fear afterwards. These feeling can sometime affect your family life, your work and professional life and even your personal life. If that becomes the case, we need to take a step back and reevaluate our decision making. When you think about it, we become so consumed with other people’s needs, likes, hobbies, schedule , you forget to fill your schedule with things you really need to do to benefit you and your future. NOW I’m not saying you should go around and be a complete A-Hole to those around you. By no means do I want you to give out No’s like Oprah gave out cars in her talk show (back in the days). But I do think you should ask yourself why you are always so quick to say yes in the first place. The answer could be that you don’t have a lot of things in your life keeping you busy, or maybe you haven’t really invested in some of your own interest. Whatever the reason might be, it is always important to look into your life and see what you need to be doing before you can commit to something you might regard later.

If saying no is something you are not ready to do or comfortable with, don’t you worry your little soul out. I have crafted my five approaches I use when I need to say now without actually Using N.O.

Check out the list below and let me know what your thoughts are on it.

As always have a great rest of the week everyone :).

Five Approaches to “How To Say No…Without Saying No”

1. Make your availability less available.
2. Find things that interest you (could be that you simply don’t have your own hobbies)
3. Offer a date and time that is convenient to you. ( Take control of your time and schedule)
4. Offer an alternative way to complete the task without you being a part of it.
5. Say Nothing.  🙂

~S.C~